10 Child Custody Terms Every Co-Parent Should Know

 
Make sure you understand child custody and how to make an agreement that works for your family.

There’s more to it than these ten terms, of course, but if you’re starting a co-parenting journey, you’ll need to become familiar with the law and procedure related to child custody. The best way to learn is to get in touch with an attorney who can guide you and fill you in on the law as it applies to your specific situation, but here are just a few of the terms that you might come across if you’re negotiating a parenting plan with your ex.

  1. “Best Interests of the Child.” The overarching concern of any child custody case is how to protect the child from harm and promote the child’s well-being to the fullest extent possible. Family Code § 3020(a).

  2. “Status Quo.” When deciding how to structure a parenting plan, it is often best to start by looking at what the parents did before the divorce - i.e. what is the status quo? What are the children used to, and how have parenting duties typically been shared?

    Parents can expect that things will change, of course, after a divorce - especially as children get older. But it is important to remember that children thrive on consistency and routine, and that the best way to help them through your divorce is to keep things as “normal” as possible by maintaining existing parenting roles.

  3. “Legal Custody.” Legal custody is the right to make decisions about your child. For example, you must have legal custody in order to make decisions about where the child will go to school or get medical care. Legal custody can be shared or - more rarely - it can be awarded solely to one parent (or a non-parent).

    Under California Family Code § 3003, “‘Joint legal custody’ means that both parents shall share the right and the responsibility to make the decisions relating to the health, education, and welfare of a child.” In most cases, parents will share joint legal custody, meaning that they both will have the independent right to make decisions about the child. The court might specify when decisions must be made jointly, otherwise, both parents are presumed to have equal rights to independently make decisions about their child.

    There are situations, however, where only one parent will be awarded legal custody. Under Family Code § 3006, “‘Sole legal custody"‘ means that one parent shall have the right and the responsibility to make the decisions relating to the health, education, and welfare of a child.” It is unusual for a parent to be granted sole legal custody, and awards of sole legal custody usually take place only when there is evidence that the parent being denied legal custody abused the child, is incapacitated, or addicted to drugs or alcohol.

  4. “Physical Custody.” Physical custody is the time a child spends in each parents’ care. Family Code §§ 3004, 3007. When you’re getting divorced, you’ll want to write up a “parenting plan” describing how physical custody will be shared. Some topics you might want to cover in your custody plan include: a) when will the child be with each parent, b) how will transportation to and from each parents’ care take place, c) how the parents will communicate with each other, and d) how the child will communicate with the parent who they are not with.

    When deciding how parents should structure their parenting time, the court starts from the presumption that “frequent and continuing contact with both parents” is what is best for the child. Family Code § 3020(b). So, unless your ex is physically abusive, addicted to drugs or alcohol, or otherwise presents a danger to your child, a court is unlikely to grant you sole physical custody.

  5. “Family Court Services Mediation.” If you go to court to decide your parenting plan, you will be required to attend a brief, mandatory mediation session with a licensed counselor whose role is to help you work out an agreement about how custody will be shared. If you cannot agree, the mediator will usually make a recommendation to the court based on their meeting with you and their reading of the file. The Family Court Services Mediation is generally brief (usually one hour), and since it is non-confidential, differs substantially from private mediation.

  6. “Supervised Visitation.” If one parent has a drug or alcohol problem, severe mental health concerns, or there is evidence of abuse, the court may order that parent to participate in supervised visitation, meaning that their time with the child will take place only with a third party present. Family Code §§ 3200 et seq.

    The supervisor may be a professional (who may or may not make reports to the court about the parents’ conduct during the visits), a relative, or a friend, depending on what the situation requires. Supervised visitation can be a means for a parent who is recovering from alcohol or drug abuse to prove their sobriety and competence when caring for children, often leading to unsupervised visits when the other parent or the court believes the recovering parent has demonstrated their ability to care for the child without supervision.

  7. “UCCJEA.” The Uniform Child Custody Jurisdiction and Enforcement Act is the law that governs which court will have jurisdiction to make child custody determinations. It comes in to play when the child is moved from one state to another either before, during, or after the custody determination is made.

  8. “Move-Away.” Want to move with your child from the city, state, or county where you lived with the child during your marriage? Then you have a “move-away” case. It can be tough to move with your children, unless you’ve already been granted primary physical custody. If you want to move with your children after your divorce, it is important to talk with a family law attorney.

  9. “Modification of Custody.” Kids grow, families change, and so do parenting plans. The plan you came up with when you were first divorced may no longer work as kids change schools or their relationships with their parents evolve. Good news - your child custody agreement or orders are always modifiable, meaning you can agree to make changes to them, or you can ask the court to order changes if you cannot make an agreement.

We hope this provides some guidance as you learn about child custody and start the process of working out a parenting plan with your ex. However, the best way to learn about the law is to speak to an attorney who can help you understand the rules that apply to your particular situation.